Pirate Captain – “And that’s why, in a straight fight, a shark would probably beat a Dracula.”
Tag: Comedy
Raising Arizona
H.I. – “I’ll be taking these Huggies and whatever cash ya got.”
Exit Through the Gift Shop
Banksy – “I used to encourage everyone I knew to make art; I don’t do that so much anymore.”
Evil Dead 2
Ash – “Groovy.”
What We Do in The Shadows
Viago – “I was thinking, maybe… I just should bring a broom down here for you if you wanted to sweep up some of the skeletons.”
The Big Sick
Kumail – “Your driver will be ready as soon as he puts on his pants.”
American Made
Barry Seal – “Guys. It ain’t about room, alright? It’s about weight.”
Sunshine Cleaning
Joe Lorkowski – “It’s a business lie, it’s different from a life lie.”
Hot Rod
Rod Kimble – “I’d rather die than live in a world where I can’t kick your ass.”
A Bug’s Life
Hopper – “First rule of leadership: Everything is your fault.”
Moana
Maui – “The chicken lives!”
Captain Underpants: The First Epic Movie
Professor Poopypants – “Hiyah class, I’m your cool new teacher, not some scary guy with a secret evil agenda”
Shaun the Sheep
Shaun – “Baa!”
Chicken Run
Babs – “I don’t want to be a pie! I don’t like gravy.”
Wallace and Gromit: A Matter of Loaf and Death
Wallace – “Farewell, my angel cake. You’ll always be my Bake-O-Lite Girl.”
Wallace and Gromit: The Curse of the Were-Rabbit
Lady Tottington – “Run, rabbit, run!”
Wallace & Gromit: A Close Shave
Wallace – “Have you been peckish during the night? Only, someone’s been at me cheese.”
Wallace & Gromit: The Wrong Trousers
Wallace – “Don’t worry, Gromit! Everything’s under control!”
The Squid and the Whale
Bernard Berkman – “What is it about high school, you read all the worst books by good writers.”
I, Tonya
LaVona Golden – “You skated like a graceless bull dyke. I was embarrassed for you.”
The Death of Stalin
Kaganovich – “How can you run and plot at the same time?”
Step Brothers
Brennan Huff – “I’m going to take a pillowcase and fill it full of bars of soap and beat the shit out of you!”
The Meyerowitz Stories
Harold – “It’s called flirting when you’re young. I’m not sure what it’s called when you’re over 70.”
Jingle All The Way
Howard – “Put that cookie down. NOW!”
Brisby Bear
James Pope – “ Its very sad you didn’t get to do what was important to you.”
The Hunt for the Wilderpeople
Ricky Baker – “”Faulkner is cauc-asian” – well, they got that wrong because you’re obviously white.”
Coco
Mamá Imelda – “…And never forget how much your family cares for you.”
The Graduate
Mrs. Braddock – “What makes you think she wants to marry you?”
Jerry Maquire
Dorothy – “You had me at “hello”. You had me at “hello”.”
Lady Bird
Christine ‘Lady Bird’ McPherson – “You are SO INFURIATING!”
The Other Guys
Terry Hoitz – “I’m like a peacock, you gotta let me fly!”
Colossal
Oscar – “Hi. She’s the monster; I’m the robot.”
Punch-Drunk Love
Barry – “You can go to places in the world with pudding. That’s funny.”
The Double
Simon – “It’s terrible to be alone too much.”
The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy
Deep Thought – “42.”
Tour de Pharmacy
Juju Pepe – “How do you beat a man on drugs if you are not on drugs?”
Deadpool
Deadpool – “Shit! I forgot the ammo!”
Deadpool 2
Deadpool – “I am Batman!”
Little Evil
Gozamel – “It’s the end of the world! We’ll drop you off afterwards. Come on!”
Little Miss Sunshine
Grandpa – “A real loser is someone who’s so afraid of not winning he doesn’t even try.”
Eagle vs. Shark
Jarrod – “I almost came as a shark actually, but then I realized an eagle’s slightly better.”
Scott Pilgrim vs. The World
Scott Pilgrim – “I have to go pee due to boredom.”
Lucky Logan
Clyde Logan – “I saw you had some sort of robbery to-do list.”
Toy Story 3
Andy – “This is Rex! The meanest, most terrifying dinosaur who ever lived! RAWR! RAWR!”
Planet Terror
Tony Block – “I’m gonna eat your brains and gain your knowledge.”
Popstar: Never Stop Never Stopping
Conner – “Ever since I was born, I was dope.”
Sleeping with Other People
Jake – “Yeah I don’t think I like me enough to introduce him to other people.”
Wyrmwood: Road of the Dead
The Captain “Never, never EVER, grab another man’s balls, in a fistfight. It shows low character.”
Everything Must Go
Nick Halsey – “I’m no different than any of you. I just don’t hide in my house.”
Going in Style
Morgan Freeman – “A conga line right into prison”
Back Seat Cinema 